Resolving Anger, The Proverbs Series: Protection or Destruction? (Proverbs 17:19)

Proverbs 17:19 — “He who loves a quarrel loves sin; he who builds a high gate invites destruction.”

There are women I know, probably women you know, who love a good argument. It seems they like nothing better than to fight about nearly everything. If you are one of these women, you know deep down how much satisfaction you get out of unleashing your temper.

I want you to hear something: even if the source of your anger comes from sin committed against you, that does not absolve you from responsibility in how you conduct yourself and express your anger. If that were the case, then an abuser who was abused would be free from guilt. If that were true, no one could be held responsible for their own wrongful actions because everyone has been wronged by someone.

In order to heal and get over your anger, you need to start seeing it in its proper context — as a high gate you’ve built for protection. As this verse cautions, though a high gate does provide protection, it also invites destruction. If you doubt that, just think about the effect your anger has on those you love.

Ask yourself — is your anger protecting or destroying your family relationships?