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What Does Healthy Self-Esteem Look Like?

What Does Healthy Self-Esteem Look Like?

“Self-esteem is made up primarily of two things: feeling lovable and feeling capable.”

-Jack Canfield

Self-esteem is more than just how we feel about ourselves. Self-esteem directly impacts how we show up in our relationships, our jobs, and our day-to-day lives. It is important, however, to differentiate between healthy self-esteem and being egotistic. In fact, being egotistic is often a result of low self-esteem!

In essence, self-esteem is a confidence in one’s own ability and worth. Here are eight traits of people with healthy self-esteem:

  1. They live with an attitude of humility. When our gifts and talents are discovered by others, our self-esteem immediately feels the positive thrust of that affirmation.
  2. They speak the truth as they see it, without fear of rejection and with no intent to harm others. Speaking the truth lovingly is not dependent on whether the recipient is able to hear it. It is never part of our life’s assignment to mind other people’s business.
  3. They know how to separate feelings from the message being delivered. Those with good levels of self-appreciation will find it progressively easier to separate emotions from the content of another’s communication and will recognize the importance of differentiating between the two in their own communications.
  4. They recognize the role that emotions such as anger, fear, and guilt play in people’s lives. They no longer take their anger, fear, or guilt at face value but instead learn to look beneath the surface to determine the reason for and source of those emotions.
  5. They don’t simply follow the followers. People with healthy self-esteem feel confident in their own opinions, interests, and beliefs. They are capable of making their own decisions, regardless of what the “crowd” is doing.
  6. They look for reasons to release others and believe in the ability of others to make decisions. People who have healthy self-esteem themselves are better able to respect and appreciate the abilities and skills of others.
  7. They are accountable in word and deed for what they say and do. If people with self-esteem make a promise, they will keep it. They have enough self-respect to not back out of their word.
  8. They know the past is the past and the present is the present. They recognize that to be emotionally healthy they must move from victim to victor. The strong person with a growing self-esteem is the one who refuses to let the past control what happens today.

Major self-esteem issues often result in co-occurring issues such as depression, an eating disorder, addiction, or abusive relationships. At, The Center • A Place of HOPE we not only help ease your symptoms, but seek to heal their root cause. If you are ready to regain true balance and happiness in your life, fill out this form or call 1-888-747-5592 to speak with a specialist today.


  1. I recently heard your broadcast in Charlotte on 105.7 FM. Thank you.

  2. Great article I plan to share with my women’s group in a few weeks! Perfect timing to get this information, as I am getting ready to teach about self-esteem and disordered eating. I hope everyone had a blessed Easter weekend.

  3. Very informative,scientifthis exactly what American boys need today esp. When connected to Theology.
    Very interesting and informative.excellent and the ultimate healing measure for our American BROTHER,and for me too.


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