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The Excessity of Sex

If pleasure has the ability to turn activities into excessities, it’s not difficult to understand how sexual activity could become one. When sex becomes an excessity, fulfilling that desire is all-encompassing.

I’ve seen couples married for decades blown apart when sex with someone else becomes more important than the marriage. I’ve seen devastation wrought on families when sexual desire is hijacked by pornography over the Internet. I’ve seen the pain and humiliation when one person’s sexual proclivities become paramount in the sexual relationship.

I’ve watched the tears and recriminations, the anger and blame, hurled by couples at each other with lethal force, bringing about the death of relationships — all over sex. I’ve seen the act God intended to enhance intimacy and love used to sow discord and distance, tearing apart relationships.

Sex becomes an excessity when what you want becomes more important than what God wants, what your spouse wants, or what you need. If you throw caution to the wind where sex is concerned and adopt a whatever-feels-good mentality, there’s a storm brewing in your life, if it hasn’t hit already.

SOURCE: Chapter 2, “Examine Your Excess,” in Gotta Have It! by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD., founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources Inc.

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