To take charge of your life, you need to know what life is really about. You need to live your life in reality, looking for and acknowledging what is real and truthful, even if it hurts or is uncomfortable or triggers an anxiety.
Anxious people can appear paralyzed by fear. They can go to extreme lengths to avoid anything that triggers their fear. They can make elaborate excuses and put off handling anything that produces anxiety.
Patty felt pretty keyed up, tense. Today, the plastic bus seat seemed harder than usual, and Patty shifted uncomfortably every few minutes. She felt like she was coming out of her skin and couldn’t wait to get off the bus and get home. It wasn’t that someone waiting just behind the front door for something. …
This soundtrack you’ve been living with wasn’t recorded overnight. Instead, it’s a compilation of messages you’ve heard, impressions and impacts you’ve assimilated, and conclusions you’ve reached over the course of your life.
Each time you take time to chronicle a struggle, you contribute to the handbook of how to overcome and succeed the next time. In essence, you write your own self-help book.
Anxieties are progressive, so it seems logical that one of the answers to anxiety would be a progression of a different kind. When a fear starts out small and keeps expanding, the way to combat anxiety is to cut that anxiety down to size. Instead of trying to take on the whole fear, you start small, working your way up your fear, like climbing a ladder.
In the city of Carmel, California, there is a famous cypress tree, weathered and gnarled and growing out of solid rock on the edge of the rugged coast. If that cypress could talk, it might complain about the coastal storms that have battered it for so many years, twisting its branches. It might curse those who maliciously …
Guilt is an insidious reaction that contributes to stress. Guilt cries out, “Never enough!” When you feel guilty or ashamed, or you blame yourself for not being or doing all you think you’re supposed to be, you can never find peace.
Children who are abused may adapt by retaining a habit of constant vigilance—as though they’re constantly under a state of siege. Their worlds are populated not by security but by patterns of risk and attack.
Sometimes the life we live causes stress and sometimes the life we lived causes stress. Each of us is a product of our past. If that past is full of ghosts, that past will haunt the present.
When the world is against you, when people are out to get you, when events are against you, you live in a state of siege. A siege mentality contributes to the state of Red Alert. Unresolved anger is a breeding ground for stress
Adults who take out their anger on children rarely are truthful about the source of that anger and hostility. Some shift the blame unfairly to their punching bag of choice, placing the burden of their actions, as well as the reasons for the actions, on the child.