Posts Tagged ‘joy’

Are You Listening to the Voice of Hope or Fear?

Wednesday, September 14th, 2011

You’re familiar with the voice of your fear. It’s been loud; it’s been constant; it’s been overwhelming. It’s time to start cultivating and listening to a softer voice; the voice of hope. The voice of fear appears to be the voice of power, but that is a sham. Over time, fear does not produce power; it only drains it. Hope is the true voice of power. Hope enables you to see beyond your perceptions to the horizon of a new dawn. Fear says everything will end; hope says life will go on.

I firmly believe in the power of optimism, hope, and joy. Optimism is the default setting that looks for the good. Hope is the firm belief that good does exist. And joy celebrates that existence. There is great good all around you, and it’s time you started looking for it.

Begin the process by listing 5 answers to the following:

  • The good about me and who I am
  • The good in my life right now
  • The good in my life in the past
  • The good in my life in the future
  • Why I choose hope over fear
  • Why I choose to live in the moment today

The world is quite effective at recording the negative sound track for your life. There is a seemingly endless supply of problems, troubles, fears, worries, concerns, and anxieties. If that is all you listen to, it will be difficult for you to switch to a good channel. I can think of no better source for material for your good channel than something called the Good Book. I’m speaking, of course, about the Bible.

In Luke 18:19, Jesus says that God is good, and I believe it. I have experienced it in my own life and in the lives of so many others, whether believers in God or not. God is good and wants good for you. He plans for good while knowing that your life will not always be smooth and that, sometimes, you’ll simply be overwhelmed.

When I am overwhelmed by life, I take heart in the story of Jeremiah.

The theme verse for the Center comes from Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Here is another passage that reminds me, even in the pits I find myself in, I am not alone: “The waters closed over my head, and I thought I was about to be cut off. I called on your name, O Lord, from the depths of the pit. You heard my plea, ‘Do not close your ears to my cry for relief.’ You came near when I called you, and you said, ‘Do not fear.’ O Lord, you took up my case; you redeemed my life” (Lam. 3:54-58).

When you feel like you’re in over y0ur head and you’re about to be cut off, God says, “Do not fear.” Concentrate on the good; listen to God. Allow his words to fill your soul and give you hope.

Dear Father, may your voice of hope be stronger than the voices of despair. Give me the strength to wait and listen for you to speak and not give the world the last word on my life. Teach me your words and your ways; make my thoughts your thoughts. Help me to have faith. Give me stamina to practice these things and your voice is all I hear.

SOURCE: Chapter 8 in Overcoming Anxiety, Worry and Fear: Practical Ways to Find Peace

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The Role of Joy in Being Happy

Wednesday, January 5th, 2011

A truly joyful, optimistic, positive person is wonderful to be around. Because they act in ways that are so contrary to how people usually handle situations, they are immediately noticeable. Others are aware that these people are different. In this way, God is glorified through your ability to exhibit joy in difficult circumstances. Your joy becomes a living testimony to others. You radiate out.

Usually when negative or pessimistic people suffer, they become incredibly inward focused. Their world shrinks and collapses in on itself, coalescing into a self-absorbed core. This core can become so dense with negativism and pain that other people get sucked in and depleted. Interacting with a pessimistic person who tends to always suffer from something can suck the joy right out of you if you’re not careful. Being around them makes you feel drained.

I have had the privilege to be around joyful, optimistic people who were undergoing hardship of incredible proportions. I have gone to visit them, fully intending to try, in some small way, to offer comfort and instead found myself receiving much more comfort. Here they are, in dire physical or circumstantial straights, and they end up doing more for me and my attitude than I ever did for them. Their complete reliance on God and the Holy Spirit to get them through the situation is crystal clear. I go to give them comfort, and they wind up giving me hope.

Their attitude is summed up for me in a passage from one of the minor prophets, Habakkuk. It’s a small book, only three chapters. Like Jeremiah, it was written at the time of the Babylonian invasion of Jerusalem. Like Job, it contains a series of conversations with God. Habakkuk doesn’t understand why God is working the way He is (using the Babylonians to punish Judah and Jerusalem), seeming to allow evil to oppress His people. In the end, Habakkuk comes to understand that God really does have the final say and will make sure justice prevails, even though it will not come about in Habakkuk’s lifetime.

At the end of the book, Habakkuk’s final words hauntingly echo in my heart as they speak to me of today’s hope anchored in tomorrow, of joy expressed defiant of circumstance, of optimism tightly grasped in trust:

Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights. ~Habakkuk 3:17-19

I don’t know what you personally are going through or what might have prompted you to pick up this book. If it was a time of prolonged sadness or tragedy, please know my heart goes out to you. And if it were only my heart I could give, frankly, it wouldn’t be enough. What I can offer you is to embrace the attitude of Habakkuk. Pray and ask God to empower you through His Spirit to experience joy within your situation. For God, nothing is impossible. The reality of this world is set; hardships and suffering are a given. God will not always remove the impossible situation from you, but He is always able to fill your heart with joy.

One way God can fill your heart with joy is through prayer, as you’ve read.

Being in constant communication with God, to receive His Spirit and perspective on life and what you’re going through, is integral to a life of joy. Another way to experience joy is through worship. This doesn’t necessarily mean only in a religious building or at a religious event. God is worshiped when you offer your life up to Him on a daily basis through the routine events of life. Worship focuses your attention on God and instills reverence and awe. In worship, you acknowledge God for who He is, in all of His attributes. This is the same God who loves you and has promised to care for you. When the world and its problems seem far too large for you to handle, prayer and worship to God can bring it back down to its proper size.

When the world and its negativity threaten to suck the joy right out of you, drawing near to God can cause it to flood back into your life. When the road of life gets bumpy, joy acts like spiritual shock absorbers and allows you to still enjoy the ride.

SOURCE: Chapter 12, “The Role of Joy in Being Happy,” in Happy for the Rest of Your Life by Dr. Gregory Jantz, founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources, Inc.

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Renewing Your Spiritual Connections

Monday, May 10th, 2010

Sunday morning. Great. Time to go to church, and I’m fresh out of excuses.

I used “not feeling well” last week and “out of town” three weeks ago. If I don’t show up today, it’ll be two Sundays in a row, and someone will probably call or want to come over. But if I don’t want to go to church on Sunday, I certainly don’t want to talk about why to someone from the visitation committee during the week. So I’ll just go — a little late and leave as soon as it’s done. I won’t show up on any list that way.

Okay, so I’m going, but I’m not dressing up. They should be happy I’m there at all.

Happy. Yeah, they’ll be happy. We’ll sing about joy, and they’ll smile and laugh. If I keep a frown on my own face and pretend I’m rummaging through my purse, I can probably get out of there without anyone coming up to me after services. Happy people don’t know what to do with a frown.

It’s not that I’m mad at them. It’s not their fault I feel this way. It’s just so hard to sit or stand in the pew and sing about joy when I don’t have any myself.

I can’t remember the last time I felt joy. I thought when I became a Christian, I was supposed to become joyful, as though God was going to wave a magic wand over me, causing all doubt and fear and loneliness and unhappiness to go away.

Well, if he did, it didn’t work. I’m still unhappy, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt so alone.

What’s the deal? Where is God in all this?

FINDING THE CONNECTION

God-talk will support your positive self-talk by agreeing with affirming statements, such as:

  • I deserve love.
  • I deserve joy.
  • I am strong enough to learn and grow each day.
  • I can experience contentment in my life.
  • I am able to respond to my circumstances instead of react.
  • I can look forward to tomorrow.

To each of these, God adds his response:

I deserve love: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).

I deserve joy: “Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away” (Isaiah 51:11).

I am strong enough to learn and grow each day: “It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect” (2 Samuel 22:33).

I can experience contentment in my life: “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation” (Philippians 4:12).

I am able to respond to my circumstances instead of react: “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is — his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:2).

I can look forward to tomorrow: “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:22-23).

SOURCE: Chapter 9, “Renewing Your Spiritual Connections,” in Moving Beyond Depression by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD., founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources Inc.

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The Joy of Confident Living: Refuse to Quit!

Tuesday, April 13th, 2010

At some point in our lives, we will find ourselves burned out, emotionally exhausted, depressed, distressed, and afraid ever to risk again.

Things don’t work out as we think they should. Intimate relationships come to an end. Friends and family die, leaving us at a loss. Our children listen to their own drummers and couldn’t care less about our core values. We lose our jobs, our courage, our time, our hair, and our confidence. We’ve all been there more times than we’d like to admit.

But the comforting news is that we are not alone, because this scourge of discouragement has plagued some of the most familiar names in history.

Consider these individuals and the challenges they faced:

  • Walt Disney was fired by a newspaper editor because he “lacked ideas.” Disney went bankrupt several times before he developed a theme park now known as “the happiest place on earth.”
  • A diving accident in 1967 left Joni Eareckson Tada a quadraplegic. Gradually Joni discovered a personal joy and peace in God so powerful that her life now inspires thousands worldwide. A talented vocalist, aritst, and writer, she is a leading advocate for disabled persons.
  • An “expert” said of football great Vance Lombardi, “He possesses minimal football knowledge and lacks motivation.”
  • The mother and father of the famed opera singer Enrico Caruso wanted him to have a career in engineering. His teachers said he had no voice at all and simply could not sing.
  • Albert Einstein did not speak until he was four years old. He didn’t read until he was seven. His teacher described Albert as “mentally slow, unsociable, and adrift forever in his foolish dreams.” He was expelled and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School.
  • Louisa May Alcott, author of Little Women, was told by her family that it might be best if she’d look for work as a servant or seamstress.
  • Jackie Robinson, grandson of a slave and abandoned at six years of age by his father, broke the color barrier in baseball and was voted the National League’s most valuable player in 1949.
  • John Bunyan, while languishing in an English prison for twelves years for preaching in non-sanctioned places, wrote Grace Abounding and Confessions of Faith and began formulating his major work, Pilgrim’s Progress.
  • Leo Tolstoy, author of War and Peace, failed college. His teachers considered him “both unable and unwilling to learn.”
  • Babe Ruth, arguably the greatest athlete of all time and famous for setting the home run record also held the record for most strikeouts.
  • Winston Churchill flunked sixth grade. He did not become prime minister of England until age sixty-two, and then only after a lifetime of defeats and missed opportunities. The greatest contributions he made to his country and the free world came when he was a senior citizen.
  • After Fred Astaire’s first screen test, the memorandum from the MGM testing director, dated 1933, read, “Can’t act. Slightly bald, Can dance a little.” Astaire kept that memo over the fireplace in his Beverly Hills home.

What made these people — most considered failures — persevere despite insurmountable odds? It wasn’t their education, their good looks, or, in most cases, even their IQ. It was something less tangible.

There was something different in their spirit that set them apart:

  1. They faced their fears, and conquered them.
  2. They stayed focused and flexible, and they had fun!
  3. They refused to give up on their dreams.
  4. They maintained a spirit of optimism.
  5. They though with their hearts.
  6. They used their stumbling blocks as stepping stones.

When you admit that most of you fears are homegrown, you can then make the decision to stop feeding them, pull them up by the roots, and regain control of your life.

SOURCE: Chapter 8: “The Joy of Confident Living” in How to De-Stress Your Life by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD., founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources Inc.

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Turning Negatives Into Postives: Mark’s Story

Friday, March 19th, 2010

Mark’s marriage ended badly. He fought it, kicking and screaming, until his wife made it quite clear she no longer wanted anything to do with him. She was done with him and the marriage. It didn’t matter how much he still loved her; she no longer loved him. She couldn’t even stand to be anywhere near him. There was someone else, and she wanted that relationship more than she wanted him. She was finished, and for a time, Mark thought he was, too.

Nothing made sense anymore. Mark couldn’t understand what he’d done wrong or why someone who had once loved him could come to hate him so much.

Had she ever really loved him at all?

How could he have been so blind?

For a long time after the divorce, Mark didn’t want to see anyone. His friends had been their friends, and some were now only her friends. With a morbid fascination, he tried to keep up with what she was doing. That ended when he found out she’d married again. She was moving on with her life, and Mark couldn’t seem to get on with his. What right did she have to be happy when she’d made him absolutely miserable? It wasn’t fair.

A good friend finally took Mark aside and told him it was time to let his ex-wife go.

While they were married, he had held on to her out of love. Since the divorce, he had held on to her out of anger. He needed to let her go — to let the anger go. It was like a breath of fresh air sweeping over Mark’s heart when he found the strength to forgive her and move on.  He decided he was not going to concentrate on those last ten months but on the five years before that when he’d been happy. He realized he was grateful to her for helping him develop an understanding of love. Ultimately, she threw it away, but Mark found he was ready to reclaim it.

With this renewed confidence in his ability to give and receive love, Mark was ready to put the past behind him and embrace the future.

FILL YOURSELF UP WITH GOOD THINGS

The pain of this world can produce so much that is negative, but God is able to take those negatives and turn them into positives. Ask God to help you clean out the old, negative spaces, so you’ll have room for the renewing attributes of a healed, redeemed life:

  • Let joy take the place of anger
  • Let confidence take the place of fear
  • Let peace take the place of guilt
  • Let mercy take the place of blame
  • Let pride take the place of shame

“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” ~Galatians 5:22

SOURCE: Chapter 4: “Gratitude,” God Can Help You Heal by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD., founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources Inc.

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Living a Full Life: Embracing Optimism, Hope and Joy

Wednesday, January 27th, 2010

When you intentionally grab hold of and fill your mind with good things like optimism, hope, and joy instead of bad things like anger and bitterness, you are able to change the content of your life. This can be a wonderful and frightening prospect. It is wonderful to consider being different from who you’ve been. It can also be frightening if you aren’t sure if this new person you’ll become will be safe.

Anger, rage, bitterness, and resentment are powerful and can take over who you are. They can warp who you are. They can become who you are and overshadow how you feel. Again, what kind of person do you really want to be?

Jesus said in Luke:

No good trees bear bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit. Each tree is recognized by its own fruit. People do not pick figs from thorn bushes, or grapes from briers. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. ~Luke 6:43-45

SOURCE: Chapter 11: “Living the Power of Optimism, Hope, and Joy” in Every Woman’s Guide to Managing YourAnger by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD., founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources Inc.

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New Year Notes of an Unknown Monk

Thursday, December 31st, 2009

When working on How to De-Stress Your Life a few years back, I found the following passage to be especially appropriate for my final thoughts in the last chapter on the subject of reflection. As we move into a brand new year, and a brand new decade for that matter, I find these words of an unknown monk to be especially relevant for those of us — all of us — looking to fill our future with increased joy, peace and happiness:

“If  I had my life to live over I would relax…. I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances. I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers…. I’d start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry-go-rounds. I would pick more daisies.”

Challenges in our everyday lives are inevitable. But in 2010, let’s make it a point of taking our time with each day, filling it with all the lovely people and experiences we enjoy most.

Blessings, my friends, in the New Year.

Gregg Jantz

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Prayer for the Power of Optimism, Hope & Joy

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

Dear Father, help me to choose to live a life devoted to you, trusting you to protect me and alert to the blessings you bring each day into my life. I want to be able to get up each morning, to say and really believe “this is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24).

Just as I need your help, your strength, wisdom, and direction to get rid of my anger, to get rid of the bad things in my life, I need your help to fill up my life with good things. I confess I can be suspicious of good things. I confess sometimes I don’t want to accept good things because I don’t want to feel obligated to change and give up something else. Help me to unclench my hands of the things I think I need in order to be able to grasp hold of what you provide.

Father, you are a God of hope. I claim Romans 15:13 for myself: fill me with all joy and peace as I trust in you, so that I may overflow with hope and the power of the Holy Spirit.”

SOURCE: Chapter 11: “Living the Power of Optimism, Hope and Joy” in Every Woman’s Guide to Managing Your Anger by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD., founder of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources Inc.

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